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22/12/2011

Receipt Roll Throw

From the "Kicker": "The person who threw the receipt roll at, and hit, Eintracht Frankfurt's Captain, Pirmin Schwegler, turned himself in....

From the "Kicker": "The person who threw the receipt roll at, and hit, Eintracht Frankfurt's Captain, Pirmin Schwegler, turned himself in. A 20-year-old graduate came into the office at FC St. Pauli together with his father, and regretted the incident. The toss was made by mistake." ...and, go on: "The person who threw the roll came forward. The graduate has already apologised to Schwegler. Additionally, he said in his father's presence, that it was by mistake, a chain of bad circumstances. He was not trying to harm anyone, much less hit anyone. He only wanted to see the roll unroll itself in the air. Instead, it turned into a hit." It is bad enough that the captain of our beloved team got hit by, of all things, a receipt roll. But to claim the cause was a product defect "...it did not unroll" is really barefaced. Whoever would do such a thing is simply stupid. By the way, he can visit our Jarltech warehouse anytime - we have a few Eintracht fans. Plus, when it comes to receipt rolls, we have plenty of ammo. :)

06/12/2011

The Fight Against Alcohol

RU-21 was developed by Russian scientists so that Russian agents during the Cold War could be better spies....

RU-21 was developed by Russian scientists so that Russian agents during the Cold War could be better spies. Obtaining new information often involves large quantities of alcohol - and he who remains in control is the one who does not get drunk. RU-21 splits alcohol in the stomach, so that it does not circulate in the bloodstream, but rather, gets directly expelled. You take two pills before you start drinking, and then every hour other one.

Our Country Manager in Spain, Javier González, truly believes this story and creatively explains the magic of RU-21 on our Facebook page: www.facebook.com/jarltech.

Enjoy!

22/11/2011

Congratulations to Deutsche Factoring Bank in Bremen ...

... for sending us the first Christmas greeting card in 2011!...

... for sending us the first Christmas greeting card in 2011! Usually, the first Christmas cards come from Asia, from companies that do not know our traditions well, or when Christmas is exactly. But for a German company, sending their greeting by 22 November, that's fast :)

However, I'll use this opportunity to greet back Bremen: Merry Christmas to you, too! We'll be sending our cards a little later ...

And here's a little incentive: Cards that do not come solo, but are attached to big, elaborate, valuable presents do get the most attention :)

08/11/2011

Survey terror

Did it become more lately? I'm receiving e-mails from hotels, airlines, etc. all the time, with questionnaires on their service....

Did it become more lately? I'm receiving e-mails from hotels, airlines, etc. all the time, with questionnaires on their service. Banks, car dealers and leasing companies are hiring call centres to call me and ask for my opinion on their performance. All questionnaires have their final question in common: "How likely is it that you will recommend us to your acquaintances, partners and friends?"

Yesterday evening, I received a questionnaire from the Marina Bay Sands Hotel in Singapore: "A few minutes of your time, to help us improve." As the football match Eintracht Frankfurt vs. Aue that I was watching on TV was terrible, I actually answered their questions. I came to the point where I couldn't refrain from laughing; when I still wasn't finished after twenty minutes ... there were 60 (!) questions. Unbelievable. Who has the time for this? To top it off – by that time, Eintracht had scored the lead in the 86th minute – when I tried to send my answers, this message popped up: "You did not fill in all the required fields." This must be a joke! This hotel has about 15 restaurants; unfortunately, I didn't have the time to test them all on the day I was there. Do I really have to check "not applicable" on each of the ten questions for each of the restaurants where I haven't been, totalling 130? I can imagine that the management of the Marina Bay Sands is terribly disappointed, as nobody is likely to send back their form. They must feel completely ignored ... I'm trying not to picture their marketing department, waiting for some response :)

Some of the questions asked are understandable, such as whether I liked the food and facilities. That's how people feel. But from a manager's point of view, if I need to ask my customers whether the rooms and restaurants are clean, then I should try and go upstairs to have a look at ten rooms myself, instead of firing superfluous questions at my customers.

With airlines, I have become most obliging: I don't refuse their questionnaires any longer; rather, I put them into the envelope unanswered. This way, I can spare the friendly flight attendant a "no". Note that I have been responding to Lufthansa's questions for 15 years, and nothing has ever changed. Cathay Pacific even wanted to know how I liked the arrival lounge; even though the questionnaires are collected before landing. Nonsense. Every time I read "we have chosen you for our survey", I wonder, whether I look bored or idle. Or do I look like I have eaten so much airline food as to be specially able to rate it.

The last survey we did was ten years ago – and even then, we at least offered our customers a "thank you". After all, we cannot advertise our speed and efficiency if we ask each customer, who just completed a highly efficient and quick purchase, to answer questions for 3 hours.

Speaking of little thank-yous for questionnaires: Emirates recently told me: "You may keep the pen, if you wish." Thank you, finally my first ballpen.

27/10/2011

Q3 is finished ...

All the "Jarltechs" (Europe, UK and Austria) had a combined turnover of 62.3 million Euros in Q3 (roughly USD 87 million), which translates into a growth of...

All the "Jarltechs" (Europe, UK and Austria) had a combined turnover of 62.3 million Euros in Q3 (roughly USD 87 million), which translates into a growth of approximately 28% over last year. It looks as though we will surpass our goals for the year again.

The quarterly news were also positive across the board at the most important of our manufacturing partners. We have the impression that our industry is growing noticeably stronger than the general economy growth. This is good news indeed, and our reaction is to hire additional employees in all areas, even though the job market currently is not so good. It is tough right now to find qualified people.

(Disclaimer: All figures are tentative.)

12/10/2011

The American Look

In contrary to my wife, I only seldom feel the urge to go shopping. And this usually happens in the USA, that I absolutely must buy some elegant clothes....

In contrary to my wife, I only seldom feel the urge to go shopping. And this usually happens in the USA, that I absolutely must buy some elegant clothes. To set myself apart in a positive way. I do this as a counterreaction to what you see there.

I was coming out of the Zebra Global Partner Convention in Las Vegas. The business people in attendance were elegantly dressed, and the hotels and restaurants were of a top standard. But you should see how the tourists there run around! Sneakers with fat soles, and 50% of the people in jogging suits?

I also took a count on the United flight from Las Vegas to San Francisco: a total of 150 passengers - of which 82 were in jogging suits, more than 120 wore sneakers, and 35 wore polo shirts with corporate printing on them. To underbid this we cannot forget the uniforms of the cabin personnel, which were at least three sizes too big and oily.

If I am not expecting guests, then I also go to the office in jeans and a button-down shirt. But like that? Where are all the US models and designers that we see so often on TV?

12/10/2011

Two And A Half Men

The main advantage of the USA currently is that the ninth season of "Two And A Half Men" is airing. Ashton Kutcher has replaced Charlie Sheen seamlessly....

The main advantage of the USA currently is that the ninth season of "Two And A Half Men" is airing. Ashton Kutcher has replaced Charlie Sheen seamlessly. A few of the Zebra managers attending the Zebra Convention in Las Vegas looked at me funny when I urgently left the "Networking Event" punctually at 9PM, so that I could turn on CBS. Hey, I've got priorities!

12/10/2011

Good Night!

I can sleep well ... but not during the company's office hours....

I can sleep well ... but not during the company's office hours. I flew from Frankfurt to Dubai this week (Gitex Show), from there to Las Vegas (Zebra Convention), and then from there to Wuhan (Scan-Tech China), and came back to Frankfurt via Singapore. From there it was on to Hannover -- the hometown of the world's best wife - ha, ha, my wife does not read my blogs anyway :) -- to see a customer. I can sleep well in hotels and airplanes. But what do you do at midnight or 1AM when the convention is finished, but in Germany it is exactly 9AM? Sleeping pills could not help here. I want to know what is going on at the office. I took my laptop into bed and did not sleep for more than an hour. Although at that time, no one needed anything from me. A steady stream of emails poured in, but there was nothing urgent among them. No one called either. It is just a damnable sickness which keeps me awake. Do other businessmen suffer from this virus too, or is it just me?

In Asia, at least, the time change is not so bad: I can sleep in longer in the mornings, and after dinner, the company in Europe is closed too. Plus, after the third glass of wine in the evening, no email seems bad. And in Asia, no one feels disturbed if you leave your cell phone on the table at an elegant restaurant.

07/10/2011

Jarltech MENA (Middle East & Northern Africa)

The time has come - Jarltech is entering into new markets....

The time has come - Jarltech is entering into new markets. On 1 January 2012 we are opening our sister businesses, Jarltech Gulf (Emirates, Bahrain and Oman), Jarltech Egypt and Jarltech Saudi Arabia in Riyadh. We have paid great attention to detail in these markets. Dubai was particularly hit by the financial crisis, and Egypt is currently in political turmoil (and their outcome cannot currently be assessed). Despite this, software houses there are looking for a distributor that offers full service, high product availability and local management.

Currently our manufacturers are working together mainly with "mixed model" partners, meaning companies which supply both end customers and resellers. The resellers are very distrustful when it comes to project-oriented surroundings in the Middle East, and they do not wish to become caught up in competitive situations to their suppliers. To avoid this, many resellers import products from Asia or the USA on their own, though they would like to save themselves this extra work.

The advantage of the current situation there is that we, as a new employer, will be welcomed everywhere, and will have relatively little trouble finding the appropriate Country Managers. There will also be a seasoned Jarltech employee in Dubai as Area Manager. Our first Arabic catalogue will be available on 1 January.

However, we do not appear to be welcomed by the German public authorities. According to them, in order for us to obtain a visa for an employee in Cairo to attend a week-long seminar in Germany, it will take three months to process!? Plus they will also require a personal meeting. That would be downright economic suicide.